Beyond the Surface

Change can be overwhelming.  Yet, change is constant.  My girls returned to school this week, one in middle school for the first time and the other in her last year of elementary. Leading up to the transition, we were nervous, anxious, and excited.  Feelings and emotions bubbled to the surface on a daily basis, most were not so pleasant.

The day before, as I searched for bus schedules and finalized lunch accounts, I became frustrated with computer issues and lack of information.  Overwhelmed with not accomplishing what I set out to do, I cried.  

Logically, I should not cry over a failed computer system or my inability to maneuver it.  On most days, I would have moved on easily and effortlessly, but not today.  I sat in my office, sobbing, with my cat on my lap, providing support.

I wasn’t crying over the unfinished tasks, I was crying over “loss,”; loss of my children’s innocence, loss of their need for me, loss of myself(as defined by my summer role).  Releasing that which no longer served me, helped me to deal with the change.

If only looking at the surface, my family would have thought I was crying over a silly inconvenience.  How often do we fail to look beyond the surface of what’s bothering our kids, our spouse, or even ourselves.  My children can be moody.  It may appear that their attitudes are due to a certain action or inaction on my part or others.  In reality, beyond the surface, their feelings and emotions are a reflection of the reality within themselves.  

In looking inward, I notice how my reaction is caused by my internal environment.  Depending on how I feel physically and mentally, dictates my feelings and emotions.  Looking beyond the surface of the problem, with love and compassion, we can delve deeper into the truer meaning behind the reaction.  In traveling beyond the surface, we can heal the true cause.

Susan J. McFarland

www.susanjmcfarland.com

susanjmcfarland@yahoo.com

An Open Floor Plan

An Open Floor Plan

I love watching shows on rebuilding, remodeling and decorating homes.  Homes are a reflection of our inner world.  The current trend involves opening up the floor plans of older homes, for seamless transitions, from one space to another.  Gone are the days of closed in, cut off, four-walled rooms, separated and isolated.  

In writing this, a law has passed, in my beloved State of Michigan, which discriminates against same-sex couples, in the arena of state funded adoptions.  An “open floor plan” means open to others, whether it is in the area of religious freedom or diversity of beliefs.  While I believe we are changing as a group, and our homes reflect this, our laws often mirror the ideas of others.

As we create an “open floor plan,” our thoughts expand, and our ideas change.  A new normal is developed.  This is happening with the environment.  Organic food was a fringe idea only a few years ago, but as a group, the desire for, and use of organic products is becoming common.  As individuals, we have the power of an “open floor plan,” by what we choose.  No matter the arena; environmental, animal rights, women’s issues or global awareness, we have a voice.  Our voice matters.  

We can choose to remain isolated and closed off in our own little space, as in the past.  Or instead, we can elect an “open floor plan” that is no longer divided and blocked.  We can create a “home” where there are no clear beginnings or endings in the space.  This space is free flowing and inviting.  

As we “open our floor plan,” we open ourselves.  The first step to an “open floor plan,” involves self-examination.  Forgiving, trusting and loving ourselves leads to loving others.  As the world moves forward, it is time for an “open floor plan”.  Imagine a space where you can come and go with ease, without judgment or discrimination, but only Love.